Elder Marvin J. Ashton of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles (deceased), in Chapter 5 of his book ‘Be of Good Cheer’ quoted our Savior: “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.”[i]
Elder Ashton answered questions members are sometimes asked: “Why don’t you have crosses on your buildings of worship?” “Why aren’t your chapels built in the shape of a cross?” “Why don’t you encourage your people to wear and display crosses?” “What is the Church’s policy toward crosses?”
¶ “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.”[ii]
We in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, in response to these questions, try to teach our people to carry their crosses rather than display or wear them. Over the centuries the cross has been recognized as a symbol of Christianity in the minds of millions. The Savior Himself has given us the bread and water as emblems of His sacrifice and death.
My message to you this day is to take up your cross. Take yourself the way you are and lift yourself in the direction of the better. Regardless of where your have been, what you have done, or what you haven’t done, trust God, believe on Him , relate to Him, worship Him as you carry your cross with dignity and determination.
We save our lives by losing them for His sake. As you find yourself, you will find God. This is true. I declare that to you. It is His promise. Take up the real cross of Jesus Christ.
What kind of cross do you bear? What is its shape, weight, size, or dimension? We all have them. Some are very visible, while others are not always evident. Sometimes the heaviest personal cross could be to carry no cross at all. Some crosses we bear are these (maybe you will relate to one or more): the cross of loneliness, the cross of physical limitations— the loss of a leg, an arm, hearing, seeing, mobility — obvious crosses (we see people with these crosses and admire their strength in carrying them with dignity); the cross of poor health, the cross of transgression, the cross of success, the cross of temptation; the cross of beauty, fame, or wealth; the cross of financial burdens, the cross of criticism; the cross of peer rejection.
What if we are challenged with more than one cross? A beautiful young lady once said to me, “Elder Ashton, it just isn’t time for me to have another cross. I’m not quite used to the one I’m carrying now. How can I handle both? Truly, suffering is part of our mortal existence, and suffering is not all bad.
….Sometimes we are given crosses so we can be taught to pray. Crosses become lighter and more manageable when we learn to pray and when we learn to patiently wait for answers to our prayers. An unwillingness to listen and learn can be a silent cross of considerable weight. Carry the cross of constant prayer even when answers are slow in coming or difficult to accept.
….A home of contention is more than a cross, it is a curse. Some homes without decoration and rehearsal train the inhabitants to be critical. This is an invisible cross of tremendous power, and is is destructive if we carry it. “The Lord hath commanded that men should… not contend one with another.” A caustic tongue can construct additional crosses that are so unnecessary [iii]. A critical tongue is a cross easily removed, but only you can do it.”
Elder Ashton spoke of many other difficult crosses… “of violated trust, of self-unacceptance, of resisting counsel, of caustic comments—> constantly putting people down, in murmuring, ridicule, contention, slander, gossip, putting yourself down and enjoying it. Regarding ‘the cross of adulation’… of this he said: “Be careful, be aware, be wise when people speak well or you. When you are honored, pointed out, and recognized, it can be a cross, especially if you believe what is said about you…
…. It is a fact of life that God can make our crosses easier to bear if we are but willing to admit that we have them and then seek His help. “And he that will not take up his cross and follow me, and keep my commandments, the same shall not be saved.”[iv]
A willingness to take yourself as you are and build from there is pleasing to God. If you have more than one cross — three of four — maybe you could build a ladder out of them and use them to climb to new heights. Sometimes becoming is more important than achieving or arriving. I’m not talking about self-indulgence. I’m talking about self-acceptance. All tomorrows can be in our favor if we carry on in a spirit of commitment and self-encouragement.”
The above came from Elder Marvin J. Ashton’s book, ‘Be of Good Cheer’ Chapter 5, p.31-37 Deseret Book 1987
