From the second chapter of their book ‘Faith is Not Blind’, Bruce and Marie Hafen share:
We first met as students in a BYU religion class called “Your Religious Problems.” We both solved our biggest “religious problem” when our friendship from that class developed blossomed into our marriage. For each class a student would pick a religious question, do research and then lead a discussion. We each wrote a short paper on how we would resolve the problem.
Some students looked at Church history issues of criticisms of Joseph Smith. Others looked at doctrinal questions, and some just wondered how to live the gospel better. It was a blessing to explore these questions together in an attitude of mutual trust. Our teacher, West Belnap, then BYU’s dean of Religion, often let us struggle. He wanted us to reach our own conclusions. Yet he knew just when and how to guide us with an occasional nudge. He was teaching us how to be good students of the gospel even as he helped strengthen our faith in it. The class helped us see that “faith is not blind.” We both know what it means when we encounter issues that require deeper digging in both thought and faith. Few of today’s questions are new ones. What is new is the volume of raw dialogue around these issues as facilitated by the internet—a tool that, as we all know, can create both clarity and chaos.
Seeking a little order for the chaotic part, we’d like to share a model of thought that tries to encourage both clear thinking and faithful choosing. When held together, thought and faith can interact to help us keep our spiritual balance—and help us grow. Let’s start by taking a look at the natural tension between the ideals of the gospel and the realities of life.
When we are young, we tend to think in terms of black and white—there is very little gray in our perspective. And many youth and young adults have a childlike optimism and loyalty that make them wonderfully teachable. They typically trust their teachers, believe what they read, and respond eagerly to invitations for Church service. New adult converts often have similar attitudes. Their cheerful spirit and outlook make a refreshing contribution to their wards and branches.
As time goes on, however, our experience with real life often introduces a new dimension—a growing awareness of a gap between the real and the ideal, between what is and what ought to be. A piano teacher explaining how practice makes perfect shared this image about setting high goals and striving to reach them.—which captures the relationship between the real and the ideal: “A distant star, / but not too far / to lure us out into the firmament./ And tho we ne’er may reach it, / we have tried / and in the trying / have learned, perchance / to make an orbit of our own.”4 We stand on the earthly surface of reality, stretching upward our lofty ideals. Let’s call the distance between where we are and where we want to be “The gap.”
We first see the gap when we realize that some things about ourselves and about other people are not what we thought they were. For example, even in a Church university that one might expect to be warm and homey, a brand-new student can feel lost and intimidated. Or maybe she brushes up against a faculty member whose attitudes about the Church are more liberal—or more conservative—than she expected. . . . ~ Bruce C. and Marie K. Haven (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2018), 2018), 7-9 (continued)
