From the book ‘What’s a Parent to Do?, author Glenn I. Latham writes:
Picture this. It’s 9:30 on a Saturday morning. Chore time.
Mother to an angry 16-year-old daughter: “Honey, it’s time to get our chores done.”
Daughter shouting disagreeably to her mother: “Get out of my face, you ! If you think I’m going to vacuum that @#*^ floor, you’re crazy!”
Mother (composed and in control): “I’m sure there are other things you’d rather do, Honey, but I’m glad you understand that I expect you to vacuum the living room floor.”
Daughter (enraged): “Are you deaf as well as dumb? Read my lips! I am NOT vacuuming the living room floor.”
Mother (in complete control): “I’m sorry you’re upset, but I’m glad you understand what your chore is.” With a kindly smile she leaves the room and goes on about her own Saturday morning routine.
Daughter (with fire in her eyes) stands in the middle of the living room—seething.
9:35— Mother hears the vacuum cleaner. Walking through the living room gently draws her fingers across her daughter’s shoulders. The daughter is startled and looks up in surprise. As the mother passes, she smiles and whispers,”I love you.”
9:44—Mother in the kitchen when the vacuuming stops.
9:46—The daughter enters the kitchen, tears wetting her cheeks. She puts her arms around her mother’s neck, holds her tight and in a whisper says, “Mother, I love you.”
Three years later. That same daughter, once consumed with anger and rebellion, is now a 19-year-old college student—and doing well with her life and studies. Her single mother’s diligence, patience, long-suffering, and waiting have at last brought forth fruit (see Alma 5:43). Rich in nurturing (see Alma 32:37-43). Completely nonreactive (see Matthew 5:39).
Some might not agree with the response I gave this overwhelmed mother as she struggled to raise a difficult rebellious teenager. “No!” they might say. “You must never allow a child to speak with such disrespect to their mother.” But I never hesitated for an instant to give that mother the direction I did! After thirty-five years of studying human behavior, both as a behavior analyst and a devout member of the Church, I could not have done otherwise. As you proceed through this book, I believe you, too, will come to that same conclusion. I certainly hope so, for I believe with all my heart that is how Christ would parent.
Conscientious, concerned parenting is certainly the most important errand ever given by the Lord to humankind. Is it possible that any faithful (Christ focused). . . . mother or father does not understand this? I doubt it. Surely there is no question in the minds of our leaders. The following declaration by Gordon B. Hinkley exemplifies teachings of Church leaders regarding this matter. Speaking to parents, he said: “The greatest asset you have in this world is those children you brought into this world and for who’s nurture and care you are responsible. . . . The family is the basic element of society. Good homes become the foundation for the strength of any nation. Good homes are certainly the rock bottom need of our nation and any nation” (Ensign, April 1995, 7).
Agreement from this position comes from many voices other than the Church. We hear it from every responsible quarter of society. Across the pulpits of virtually every religious denomination on earth the call is made to “be good parents.” Leaders of business and industry make similar appeals, often paying large sums of money to teach and encourage their employees to “be good parents.”. . . ~Glen I. Latham, What’s a Parent to Do? (Deseret Book, Salt Lake City, 1997) 1-3
