Elder Garrit W. Gong of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said in April 2022 general conference:
Do you know your story? What your name means? World population grew from 1.1 billion people in 1820 to nearly 7.8 billion in 2020.4 The year 1820 seems to be an inflection point in history. Many born after 1820 have living memory and records to identify several family generations. Can you think of a special, sweet memory with a grandparent or other family member?
Whatever the total number of individuals who have lived on the earth, it is finite, countable, one person at a time. You and I, we each matter.
And please consider this: whether or not we know them, we are each born of a mother and father. And each mother and father is born of a mother and father.5 By birth or adoptive lineage, we are ultimately all connected in the family of God and in the human family.
In this age of “I choose me,” societies benefit when generations connect in meaningful ways. We need roots to have wings—real relationships, meaningful service, life beyond fleeting social media veneers.
Connecting with our ancestors can change our lives in surprising ways. From their trials and accomplishments, we gain faith and strength.16 From their love and sacrifices, we learn to forgive and move forward. Our children become resilient. We gain protection and power. Ties with ancestors increase family closeness, gratitude, miracles. Such ties can bring help from the other side of the veil.
Just as joys come in families, so can sorrows. No individual is perfect, nor is any family. When those who should love, nurture, and protect us fail to do so, we feel abandoned, embarrassed, hurt. Family can become a hollow shell. Yet, with heaven’s help, we can come to understand our family and make peace with each other.17
Sometimes unwavering commitment to abiding family relationships helps us accomplish hard things. In some cases, community becomes family. A remarkable young woman whose troubled family moved frequently found a loving Church family wherever she was to nurture and give her place. Genetics and family patterns influence but do not determine us.
God wants our families to be happy and forever. Forever is too long if we make each other unhappy. Happy is too short if cherished relationships stop with this life. Through sacred covenants, Jesus Christ offers His love, power, and grace to change us18 and heal our relationships. Selfless temple service for dear ones makes our Savior’s Atonement real for them and us. Sanctified, we can return home to God’s presence as families united eternally.19
Each of our stories is a journey still in progress, as we discover, create, and become with possibilities beyond imagination.
The Prophet Joseph Smith said, “It may seem to some to be a very bold doctrine that we talk of—a power which records or binds on earth and binds in heaven.”20 The sociality we create here can exist with eternal glory there.21 Indeed, “we without [our family members] cannot be made perfect; neither can they without us be made perfect,” that is, in “a whole and complete and perfect union.”22
What can we do now?
For Elder Gong’s complete talk, including working links, click ‘We Each Have a Story’.
