From the book ‘The Power of Stillness;’
(A previous post of a year ago. . . .) “It’s common for us to talk about the aim of Church gatherings to be uplifting, comforting, and consoling our spirits. Although these are things we understandably want, what happens when the opposite happens, and it’s hard to be with others? Is that even okay?
The story is told of a community of monks living together well on an isolated mountain, until one monk began seriously annoying everyone else. Finally, in the middle of the night, that monk stormed off and moved out of the monastery, much to everyone’s relief. The head monk, however, went and convinced him to come back. The other monks were appalled, asking, “Why did you do this? We just got rid of him!” The wise monk responded, “We need him. He is the yeast to our bread. Without him we will not grow.” Are we open to other kinds of “leaven” in the loaf? (Now, continuing from the above post of August 5 year ago. . . .)
Are we open to other kinds of “leaven” in the loaf? One Sunday, while serving as Primary President, Carrie was not at her best at church: I dropped important balls, put my foot in my mouth and was all-around clumsy in my interaction with others. I retreated home, and, right in the middle of my sulking soirée, had an awful epiphany: I am the yeasty monk! I am the yeast monk in Primary!
That led to a full on weeping and wailing session, which my wise husband just sat and watched, in awe, probably, at my drama. I went on and on about how I’m not a good leader . . . and someone seriously needs to fire me . . . and how we need to have paid clergy so they don’t have to deal with my mess-ups. . . .
Why am I being asked to subject others to my weaknesses? How does this really benefit anyone? Why do we have to worship as a group like this?
Christian author John Backman has written that his motivation to come to church is, in part, so he can be uncomfortable. Compared to staying home in his own thoughts, he describes how worship in a collective body allows him to be challenged by others’ ideas that sometimes even drives him nuts!10 How easy would it be to be united if we simply agreed on everything, right? How valuable, then, it is that we do not agree on so many topics—politics, health, Napoleon Dynamite— and are still asked by the Lord to be one and learn to be united.
These words from Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk, are a helpful summation, translated into a language more representative of the Latter-day Saint community: “In the ward (sangha) there must be difficult people. These difficult people are a good thing for you—they will test your capacity to build Zion and practice Christlike love (of sangha-building and practicing). One day when that person says something that is not very nice to you’ll be able to smile and it won’t make you suffer at all. I am speaking to you our of my experience. I now have a lot more patience and compassion, and because I have more patience and compassion my happiness has grown much greater. You suffer because your understanding and compassion are not yet large enough to embrace difficult people, but with practice you will grow, your heart will grow, your understanding and compassion will grow. And thanks to the ward (sangha) practicing together, those people will transform. That is a great success.
It’s caring for each other that turns the ward into a covenant people. And that means loving those who are quirky, frustrating, or downright “out there.” Because the reality for every single one of us it, well, some days your’re the bread, and some days you’re the yeast. And we all need each other to keep growing.
Jacob Z. Hess, Carrie L. Skarda, Kyle D. Anderson, Ty R. Mansfield, ‘The Power of Stillness’ (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2019), 116-117
